There's an important point in here somewhere........
Published on September 5, 2004 By The Crusaders In Misc
You may think this is trivial at first glance but there is a point I am getting to ....that hopefully I wont forget along the way.....

I have always been blonde haired my entire life and even when it started to darken in my late teens I used artificial blonding agents to keep it the same. That was until a few months ago I noticed under the harsh lights of our bathroom mirror that I could see my scalp shining through....No...I'm not gong bald but there was some considerable thinning...enough for me to say...No More!
So, I stopped touching up my roots and slowly my new colour started coming through, although a lot darker than I had expected....And I started wearing a hat.
Anyways, I was doing the weekly shopping and paused down the Haircolour segment and chose a hair colour dye the closest to what my new growth as I could surmise at the time. I went home and as we were going out for dinner that evening, with our little one being safely babysat with my Mom, my other half said .'...do it ...go do your hair.....before we go out' (My other half had made it known to me that he would be awesomely happy about me losing the blonde as it tended to make me a beacon to others....or so he said) so I did......though I really should have bought two packs because my hair is really pretty long and I ran out of the stuff almost as I had started......so frantically I'm trying to spread it through before I am left with an absolute mess of hair. (It turned out alright despite the lack of enough of the dye)
Well so I did it .....Blonde to Brown in a day....I had a split second of regret before I slapped myself in the face (mentally!) and told myself it was just hair......bloody hell it's just hair.....what difference is it really going to make to who I am.....I am still me only I look just a little different....(It's amazing how we can cling to the familiar at times!)
Well....I'm over it....I'm quite fine with my new hair colour......I am ...but others are not....."Why....did you do that?!"...."Oh my God what happened to your hair?"......."Don't you miss your blonde?"......Miss the colour of my hair....there really are a million other things I would miss before I miss my hair colour.......I hardly ever saw it anyway. The comments kept rolling in. The way people are reacting to it one would think I had sawn off a leg or an arm.
I really had a proper point to this that I think I have forgotton.......there's a few distractions going on with my son climbing the walls that's keeping this from flowing properly.....
So, please bear with me. What this has brought to my attention is the way people hold importance to appearance....when really it doesn't matter......I may not look the same as I did last week but that has not changed who I am....(unless the hair dye I used contained a mind altering drug that seeps through the skull on application.)....so why do people react as if I have personally done this to confuse them with who I am......"OH I knew exactly who you were when you looked like that .....now I just don't know anymore"......This attitude confuses me because I just don't judge someone on their appearance...because it has little basis on who they are...really.........we are our minds...our bodies are simply our shell....what get's us around so we can use our minds some more. Which would you prefer....mind with no body...or body with no mind?
And I think that's why I enjoy JoeUser so much .......because you just can't do that here......I don't know what you look like and you don't know what I look like and even if we did it would make no difference because what matters is our words....our attitudes.....and who we are not what we are......not the crust on the inside but the depth on the inside.
I found when I first came here that I naturally tried to form visions of who I was communicating with....but I have shut the door on that because you are all such lovely people .....so why should I try and package you in a box, label it and let it blind me to who you really are......the you inside ....the you I am learning about ....the you who shares part of your life with me......
And maybe this way of communication will head us on a better course in life.....where we don't judge others before we get to know them as a person.


Oh and my son ....with encouragement from his goodhumored father ofcourse, has taken to calling me 'Brownie' opposed to 'Blondie'....which doesn't sound all too attractive.....but hey tis all in jest!!

Comments
on Sep 06, 2004
I'm S-L-I-P-P-I-N-G....slipping down the list.....slowly but surely....soon no one will read this...as it fades into obscurity
And it will be like it was never here...............................................................
on Sep 08, 2004


Thought I'd give you a little bump back up the list.......this brought back memories of cutting my hair. When I graduated high school, my hair was down past my waist and I pampered it, never colored, didn't use a blow drier, hair spray, etc. A week or so after graduation I had my best friend cut half of it (14") off. Then I went off to college. When I came home at Christmas, my hair was up to my chin and bright red (instead of dark brown). It was a big change, but fun!

As far as not judging people on looks, I agree. This is a wonderful place to just be yourself. But, if you're curious, take a look at TexasWahine's article What you look like to me from a few weeks ago. It's pretty funny.
on Sep 08, 2004
Fun article! Thanks for bumping it, LadyCleve, otherwise I might not have seen it.

I have an appointment this afternoon to have a "trim." I think I'm going to have them take off at least an inch probably more like two. It's nice to have hair long enough to be able to take off that much and not really notice it. It just helps the health of the hair. (Mine anyway, cause it gets all dried out and icky after a while).

Appearances ARE important in that if you don't take care of and neglect yourself you're not showing respect for your own body. If you don't respect yourself why should any body else? Other than that, it shouldn't matter what color you choose to keep your hair!
on Sep 08, 2004
LadyCleve,

Thankyou, M'dear! My hair has been stuck in a time warp for at least 15 years.....I mean it was the exact same colour....same length (though ofcourse it did keep growing but once it's a certain length ..it's just long!!)...and I had no trendy style.....the style would be what I call high school girl hair.......and I'm almost thirty now so it's about time for a little change...I think I was just comfortable in the familiarity....
I did have a look at Texas Wahines 'What you look like to me'...that was around about when I happened upon JU......it was pretty funny to see her impressions!!
So, why are you here....at JU, LadyCleve?
on Sep 08, 2004
xtine,

Hello.......looks like we have a little girls club goin on.....perhaps we can all meet for virtual coffee sometime!?

How are you, xtine? yeah....I have to go for a haircut soon too......I love and hate the smell at the hairdressers at the same time....how about you?

Appearances ARE important in that if you don't take care of and neglect yourself you're not showing respect for your own body.

.....I like what you said here.....so, If you look after yourself for your health and self respect....you're going to end up looking good as a result anyway....rather than just looking after your outer shell.....or not caring at all.
on Sep 08, 2004
Crusaders: Great article. I'm a brownie, too. I have made radical changes to my hair in the past (I've had purple streaks, burgundy hair, black with blonde around my face, dark black, chocolate brown, auburn, red, highlights, brassy blonde, short hair, long hair, straight hair, curly hair), and I can sympathize with you on the shock thing. But as you noted in your article, it's just hair . . . I hope you enjoy your new dark locks!
on Sep 09, 2004
Hello Texas Wahine!!

How are you going ?! Yeah....I'm over the hair thing.....hasn't made a bit of difference from my point of view...though I am still getting a few shock comments from others! Oh well....
Not long now before your other half gets back...hey......bet you're counting the days.......hours....minutes....seconds....!

Stay healthy and happy and I'll be seeing you around.